I am currently sitting in the dark, crying. That sounds a lot more dramatic than the reality- but it sure is a great hook. I am inhabiting the shadows, nestled in a rocking chair, watching my child drift off to sleep- my presence a comfort to his nervous system. An honor I take for granted … Continue reading Gratitude
It’s been a battle
I've started running again. Mostly as an attempt to help regulate myself so I don't yell at my family unprovoked. It may have also been due to a prod from my therapist to begin making time for myself- an area in which I am woefully lacking. What I have found, in addition to the activity … Continue reading It’s been a battle
Here we go….
Yet again, my words have languished in a drafts file. It has become my routine- I am beginning to find comfort in it rather than irritation. My little breadcrumbs of predictability. The themes of these musings all seem to want to go to the same place- a destination I have been avoiding. Not due to … Continue reading Here we go….
A little bit o’ change
When I was a teenager my mother gifted me the book Who Moved My Cheese. She hoped the work would help me navigate my aversion to plan deviations. I don't like change. I never have. Even when said change is something I orchestrated- an alteration which I desire to occur. I struggle with the process … Continue reading A little bit o’ change
A book isn’t just a book
I had a difficult time learning to read. Frankly, I had a difficult time acclimating to the structure of school in general. I was included in a select group of children appointed to participate in a failed experiment in the education system known as Readiness. At the onset of drafting this narrative, I spent an … Continue reading A book isn’t just a book
Finding my sea legs
I am coming to realize that adulthood is waiting for life- the next hectic interlude- to run it's course and allow breathing room, only to realize that the chaotic stretches occur concurrently and don't particularly conclude. Which is basically an eloquent and wordy way of saying, I keep waiting for things to calm down only … Continue reading Finding my sea legs
Coming out of hibernation
I continue to endeavor a narration of the past few months. They concurrently feel like several lifetimes lived and the comfort of consistency. The steady hand of contentment has been my ballast. The salve to the anxiety created by the unknown. I get a bit wrapped up in the delivery. Choosing the correct word. The … Continue reading Coming out of hibernation
Halloween!
For those that know and love me... Actually, for those merely in an adjacent orbit as mine know, Halloween is a beloved pastime of mine. Decorations are unboxed on October first without fail- including this year as I battled allergies and the subsequent breakdown of my ailing body. I wear themed clothing items daily throughout … Continue reading Halloween!
The reoccurring question
I get asked the same question often by people who learn of my previous marriage and my current relationship. The question is always the same, solicited with hushed tenderness- would you want to be married again? It's a fair question. The curious parties come from various marital statuses. Some are betrothed, some divorced. Others have … Continue reading The reoccurring question
The Kind one
I have an absurd sense of accomplishment every time Moose is weighed and measured at the doctor. He is 80th percentile in height and my chest swells with pride as if I am the sole reason he is tall. I am not. I am not even a contributing factor as to why he is tall. … Continue reading The Kind one
Mommyhood Mayhem and Me 